Not So Right

My cousin and his wife visited us. They came mainly because they wanted me to read and explain to them some documents sent by a well-known insurance company.

They had just sold their HDB flat and is loaded with ready cash. Their property agent, who doubles as an insurance agent, saw this as an opportunity to sell them a life insurance policy. With much persuasion, she, the agent, managed to get my cousin's wife, who has only Primary educaiton, to sign in the agreement form on her laptop.

According to my cousin's wife, she had repeatedly told the agent that all that she wanted was to put the money, $50,000 , in a bank fixed deposit and did not want to buy any insurance policy.

This high-pressured way of selling life insurance policy to a 70-yr-old lady who doesn't need one is not right.

Nothing Is for Free

We Singaporeans, whether young or old, are often exhorted to work hard because nothing is for free. That is, anything that you want, you have to pay or work for it, and for any work that you do for anybody, you expect to receive something in return. This blunt and down-to-earth advice seems to be accepted by Singaporeans as the guiding principle in our everyday dealings with one another.

I'm not here to debate the rights or wrongs of this advice. What I want to point out is that such a mindset of ours has helped make Singapore very successful but has also helped us Singaporeans become rather calculating and cynical: calculating because we weigh the pros and cons before agreeing to a deal ... any deal, whether political, business or social ... to ensure that we have something to gain, the more the better; cynical because we assume that all Singaporeans will not do things for free, and so if anyone says he is doing something for free you find it difficult to believe him. "Doing it for free? I don't believe it!" you would say. "Surely he has some ulterior motive for doing it free!"

Yes, if you want to have a bright future, you have to work hard for it.

Of course, generally you have to pay and expect to be paid for any work or service done.

Kiasu (afraid to lose out) Singporeans, being told that nothing is for free, obediently follow this guiding principle. So, children study very hard and adults work long hours to better themselves, so much so that they have little time to inculcate good manners. Many as a result become self-centred, uncaring and calculating. You want good service? Pay for it. The more you pay the better service you get! Otherwise, don't expect me to serve you nicely. Neither would I expect to receive anything free.

We must understand the reason for telling people that nothing is for free. It is to make them realise that they should rely on themselves, not be on the dole, if they want to live a useful and meaningful life.

But if this attitude of nothing is for free is carried too far, to the extent of wanting to make a profit even when dealing with friends or when 'volunteering' to do community work, then I don't think Singapore will ever become a gracious society.